Twelfe Night, or What You Will from Mr. William Shakespeares comedies, histories, & tragedies. Published according to the true originall copies.
Mr. VVilliam Shakespeares comedies, histories, & tragedies
Bodleian First Folio, Arch. G c.7
Heminge, John, approximately 1556-1630 Condell, Henry, -1627Autres contributions
Available for reuse, according to the terms of the Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported.
url urlSHAKESPEARES
COMEDIES,
HISTORIES, &
TRAGEDIES.
[18], 303, [1], 46, 49-100, [2], 69-232, [2], 79-80, [26], 76, 79-82, 80-98, [2], 109-156, 257-993 [i.e. 399], [1] p.; fol.
Numbering peculiarities: 1st count: p.50 misnumbered 58; p.59 misnumbered 51; p.86 misnumbered 88; p.153 misnumbered 151; p.161 misnumbered] 163; p.164 misnumbered 162; p. 165 misnumbered 163; p. 189 misnumbered 187; p. 249 misnumbered 251; p.250 misnumbered 252; p. 265 misnumbered 273 -- 2nd count: p.37 misnumbered 39 in some copies; p.89 misnumbered 91; p. 90 misnumbered 92 -- 3rd count: p.165-166 numbered 167 and 168 respectively; p. 216 numbered 218 -- 5th count: p. 279 misnumbered 259; p. 282 misnumbered 280; p.308 misnumbered 38; p. 379 misnumbered 389; p. 399 misnumbered 993.
The signatures varies between sources, with the most commonly cited being Hinman's and West's: 1. Hinman: πA⁶ (πA1+1) [πB²], ²A-2B⁶ 2C² a-g⁶ χgg⁸ h-v⁶ x⁴ χ1.2 [para.]-2[para.]⁶ 3[para]¹ aa-ff⁶ gg² Gg⁶ hh⁶ kk-bbb⁶; 2. West: πA⁶ (πA1+1, πA5+1.2)²A-2B⁶ 2C² a-g⁶ ²g⁸ h-v⁶ x⁴ 'gg3.4' (±'gg3') [para.]-2[para.]⁶ 3[para]¹ 2a-2f⁶ 2g² 2G⁶ 2h⁶ 2k-2v⁶ x⁶ 2y-3b⁶.
Mis-signed leaves: a3 mis-signed Aa3; ³gg1 mis-signed Gg; nn1-nn2 mis-signed Nn and Nn2 and oo1 mis-signed Oo.
"The life and death of King Iohn" begins new pagination on leaf a1 recto; "The tragedy of Coriolanus" begins new pagination on leaf aa1 recto.
Predominantly printed in double columns.
Text within simple lined frame.
Colophon reads: "Printed at the charges of W. Iaggard, Ed. Blount, I. Smithweeke, and W. Aspley. 1623.".
Editors’ dedication signed: Iohn Heminge. Henry Condell.
Two MS verses on first endpaper verso: 1. 9 lines of verse by an unknown author, first line reads "An active swain to make a leap was seen". 2. A copy of Ben Jonson’s printed "To the Reader"; MS note on t.p. (mutilated) appears to read "Honest [Shakes]peare". Minor annotations on leaf 2n4 (Macbeth). All in an early English hand, presumably added after leaving the Library.
Seventeenth-century (1624) English (Oxford) smooth calf. Bound for the Bodleian Library by William Wildgoose, with evidence of two cloth ties, red sprinkled edge. Formerly chained, with evidence of chain staple at the head of the upper cover. Remains of paper label at the head of the spine. Enclosed in 20th century book box by Maltby of Oxford. See S. Gibson in Original Bodleian Copy of First Folio, p. 12-13. One of four items sent out on 17th February 1624 for binding by Wildgoose containing printed waste from a copy of Cicero’s "De Officiis, et al." [Deventer: Richard Pafraet, between 1480 and 1485] as paste-downs. For more information on this work see: Bod. Inc. Cat., C-322.
For further details on the printing of this item see Hinman, Charleton. The printing and proof-reading of the First Folio of Shakespeare: Oxford, 1963.
Acquired by the Bodleian in 1623, presumably in sheets. It was sent out to William Wildgoose on for binding (see: Library Records e.258, fol. 48r) and upon its return chained in Duke Humfrey at shelfmark S 2.17 Art. It is listed in the Bodleian’s catalogue of printed books but was gone by the publication of the next catalogue in , replaced by the newer Third Folio (). There is no explicit reference in Library Records to the disposal of this copy, but there is a record of a sale of "superfluous library books" to Richard Davis, a bookseller in Oxford, in for the sum of £24.
After leaving the Bodleian this copy entered the collection of Richard Turbutt of Ogston Hall, Derbyshire at some point in the early 18th century. It stayed in the family’s possession until , when it was reacquired by the Bodleian for the sum of £3000, raised by public subscription. For a full discussion of the rediscovery and purchase of this copy see: F. Madan, G. M. R. Turbutt and S. Gibson, The Original Bodleian Copy of the First Folio of Shakespeare (theTurbutt Shakespeare) (Oxford, 1905)
For a full discussion of this copy and the digital version see http://shakespeare.bodleian.ox.ac.uk/ and West and Rasmussen (2011), 31.
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Twelfe Night, Or what you will.
Actus Primus, Scæna Prima.
[Act 1, Scene 1]
Lords.
Duke.
Cu.
Du.
Cu.
Du.
Val.
Du.
Scena Secunda.
[Act 1, Scene 2]
Vio.
Cap.
Vio.
Cap.
Vio.
Cap.
Vio.
Cap.
Vio.
Cap.
Vio.
Cap.
Vio.
Cap.
Vio.
Cap.
Vio.
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Cap.
Vio.
Cap.
Vio.
Scæna Tertia.
[Act 1, Scene 3]
Sir To.
109What a plague meanes my Neece to take the [l. 110] death of her brother thus? I am sure care's an enemie to [l. 111] life.
Mar.
112By my troth sir Toby, you must come in earlyer [l. 113] a nights: your Cosin, my Lady, takes great exceptions [l. 114] to your ill houres.
To.
115Why let her except, before excepted.
Ma.
116I, but you must confine your selfe within the [l. 117] modest limits of order.
To.
118Confine? Ile confine my selfe no finer then I am: [l. 119] these cloathes are good enough to drinke in, and so bee [l. 120] these boots too: and they be not, let them hang them [l. 121] selues in their owne straps.
Ma.
122That quaffing and drinking will vndoe you: I [l. 123] heard my Lady talke of it yesterday: and of a foolish [l. 124] knight that you brought in one night here, to be hir woer
To.
125Who, Sir Andrew Ague‑cheeke?
Ma.
126I he.
To.
127He's as tall a man as any's in Illyria.
Ma.
128What's that to th'purpose?
To.
129Why he ha's three thousand ducates a yeare.
Ma.
To.
132Fie, that you'l say so: he playes o'th Viol‑de‑gam [l. 133] boys, and speaks three or four languages word for word [l. 134] without booke, & hath all the good gifts of nature.
Ma.
135He hath indeed, almost naturall: for besides that [l. 136] he's a foole, he's a great quarreller: and but that hee hath [l. 137] the gift of a Coward, to allay the gust he hath in quarrel [l. 138] ling, 'tis thought among the prudent, he would quickely [l. 139] haue the gift of a graue.
Tob.
140By this hand they are scoundrels and substra [l. 141] ctors that say so of him. Who are they?
Ma.
142They that adde moreour, hee's drunke nightly [l. 143] in your company.
To.
144With drinking healths to my Neece: Ile drinke
145to her as long as there is a passage in my throat, & drinke [l. 146] in Illyria: he's a Coward and a Coystrill that will not [l. 147] drinke to my Neece. till his braines turne o'th toe, like [l. 148] a parish top. What wench? Castiliano vulgo: for here coms [l. 149] Sir Andrew Agueface.
And.
150Sir Toby Belch. How now sir Toby Belch?
To.
151Sweet sir Andrew.
And.
152Blesse you faire Shrew.
Mar.
153And you too sir.
Tob.
154Accost Sir Andrew, accost.
And.
155What's that?
To.
156My Neeces Chamber‑maid.
Ma.
157Good Mistris accost, I desire better acquaintance
Ma.
158My name is Mary sir.
And.
159Good mistris Mary, accost.
To,
160You mistake knight: Accost, is front her, boord [l. 161] her, woe her, assayle her.
And.
162By my troth I would not vndertake her in this [l. 163] company. Is that the meaning of Accost?
Ma.
164Far you well Gentlemen.
To.
165And thou let part so Sir Andrew, would thou [l. 166] mightst neuer draw sword agen.
And.
167And you part so mistris, I would I might neuer [l. 168] draw sword agen: Faire Lady, doe you thinke you haue [l. 169] fooles in hand?
Ma.
170Sir, I haue not you by'th hand.
An.
171Marry but you shall haue, and heeres my hand.
Ma.
172Now sir, thought is free: I pray you bring your [l. 173] hand to'th Buttry barre, and let it drinke.
An.
174Wherefore (sweet‑heart?) What's your Meta [l. 175] phor?
Ma.
176It's dry sir.
And.
177Why I thinke so: I am not such an asse, but I [l. 178] can keepe my hand dry. But what's your iest?
Ma.
179A dry iest Sir.
And.
180Are you full of them?
Ma.
181I Sir, I haue them at my fingers ends: marry now [l. 182] I let go your hand, I am barren.
To.
183O knight, thou lack'st a cup of Canarie: when did [l. 184] I see thee so put downe?
An.
185Neuer in your life I thinke, vnlesse you see Ca [l. 186] narie put me downe: mee thinkes sometimes I haue no [l. 187] more wit then a Christian, or an ordinary man ha's: but I [l. 188] am a great eater of beefe, and I beleeue that does harme [l. 189] to my wit.
To.
190No question
An.
191And I thought that, I'de forsweare it. Ile ride [l. 192] home to morrow sir Toby.
To.
193Pur‑quoy my deere knight?
An.
194What is purquoy? Do, or not do? I would I had [l. 195] bestowed that time in the tongues, that I haue in fencing [l. 196] dancing, and beare‑bayting: O had I but followed the [l. 197] Arts.
To.
198Then hadst thou had an excellent head of haire.
An.
199Why, would that haue mended my haire?
To.
200Past question, for thou seest it will not coole my [l. 201] (nature
An.
202But it becoms me wel enough, dost not?
To.
203Excellent, it hangs like flax on a distaffe: & I hope [l. 204] to see a huswife take thee between her legs, & spin it off.
An.
205Faith Ile home to morrow sir Toby, your niece wil [l. 206] not be seene, or if she be it's four to one, she'l none of me: [l. 207] the Count himselfe here hard by, wooes her.
To.
208Shee'l none o'th Count, she'l not match aboue hir [l. 209] degree, neither in estate, yeares, nor wit: I haue heard her [l. 210] swear t. Tut there's life in't man.
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And.
211Ile stay a moneth longer. I am a fellow o'th [l. 212] strangest minde i'th world: I delight in Maskes and Re [l. 213] uels sometimes altogether.
To.
214Art thou good at these kicke‑chawses Knight?
And.
215As any man in Illyria, whatsoeuer he be, vnder [l. 216] the degree of my betters, & yet I will not compare with [l. 217] an old man.
To.
218What is thy excellence in a galliard, knight?
And.
219Faith, I can cut a caper.
To.
220And I can cut the Mutton too't.
And.
221And I thinke I haue the backe‑tricke, simply as [l. 222] strong as any man in Illyria.
To.
223Wherefore are these things hid? Wherefore haue [l. 224] these gifts a Curtaine before 'em? Are they like to take [l. 225] dust, like mistris Mals picture? Why dost thou not goe [l. 226] to Church in a Galliard, and come home in a Carranto? [l. 227] My verie walke should be a Iigge: I would not so much [l. 228] as make water but in a Sinke‑a‑pace: What dooest thou [l. 229] meane? Is it a world to hide vertues in? I did thinke by [l. 230] the excellent constitution of thy legge, it was form'd vn [l. 231] der the starre of a Galliard.
And.
232I, 'tis strong, and it does indifferent well in a [l. 233] dam'd colour'd stocke. Shall we sit about some Reuels?
To.
234What shall we do else: were we not borne vnder [l. 235] Taurus?
And.
236Taurus? That sides and heart.
To.
237No sir, it is leggs and thighes: let me see thee ca [l. 238] per. Ha, higher: ha, ha, excellent.
Scena Quarta.
[Act 1, Scene 4]
Val.
239If the Duke continue these fauours towards you [l. 240] Cesario, you are like to be much aduanc'd, he hath known [l. 241] you but three dayes, and already you are no stranger.
Vio.
242You either feare his humour, or my negligence, [l. 243] that you call in question the continuance of his loue. Is [l. 244] he inconstant sir, in his fauours.
Val.
245No beleeue me.
Vio.
246I thanke you: heere comes the Count.
Duke.
247Who saw Cesario hoa?
Vio.
248On your attendance my Lord heere.
Du.
Vio.
Du.
Vio.
261Say I do speake with her (my Lord) what then?
Du.
Vio.
267I thinke not so, my Lord.
Du.
Vio.
Scena Quinta.
[Act 1, Scene 5]
Ma.
283Nay, either tell me where thou hast bin, or I will [l. 284] not open my lippes so wide as a brissle may enter, in way [l. 285] of thy excuse: my Lady will hang thee for thy absence.
Clo.
286Let her hang me: hee that is well hang'de in this [l. 287] world, needs to feare no colours.
Ma.
288Make that good.
Clo.
289He shall see none to feare.
Ma.
290A good lenton answer: I can tell thee where yt [l. 291] saying was borne, of I feare no colours.
Clo.
292Where good mistris Mary?
Ma.
293In the warrs, & that may you be bolde to say in [l. 294] your foolerie.
Clo.
295Well, God giue them wisedome that haue it: & [l. 296] those that are fooles, let them vse their talents.
Ma.
297Yet you will be hang'd for being so long absent, [l. 298] or to be turn'd away: is not that as good as a h[.]nging to [l. 299] you?
Clo.
300Many a good hanging, preuents a bad marriage: [l. 301] and for turning away, let summer beare it out.
Ma.
302You are resolute then?
Clo.
303Not so neyther, but I am resolu'd on two points
Ma.
304That if one breake, the other will hold: or if both [l. 305] breake, your gaskins fall.
Clo.
306Apt in good faith, very apt: well go thy way, if [l. 307] sir Toby would leaue drinking, thou wert as witty a piece [l. 308] of Eues flesh, as any in Illyria.
Ma.
309Peace you rogue, no more o'that: here comes my [l. 310] Lady: make your excuse wisely, you were best.
Clo.
311Wit, and't be thy will, put me into good fooling: [l. 312] those wits that thinke they haue thee, doe very oft proue [l. 313] fooles: and I that am sure I lacke thee, may passe for a [l. 314] wise man. For what saies Quinapalus, Better a witty foole, [l. 315] then a foolish wit. God blesse thee Lady.
Ol.
316Take the foole away.
Clo.
317Do you not heare fellowes, take away the Ladie.
Ol.
318Go too, y'are a dry foole: Ile no more of you: be [l. 319] sides you grow dis‑honest.
Clo.
320Two faults Madona, that drinke & good counsell
[l. 321] wil amend: for giue the dry foole drink, then is the foole
[l. 322] not dry: bid the dishonest man mend himself, if he mend,
[l. 323] he is no longer dishonest; if hee cannot, let the Botcher
[l. 324] mend him: any thing that's mended, is but patch'd: vertu
[l. 325] that transgresses, is but patcht with sinne, and sin that a
[l. 326] mends, is but patcht with vertue. If that this simple
[l. 327] Sillogisme will serue, so: if it will not, vvhat what remedy?
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328As there is no true Cuckold but calamity, so beauties a [l. 329] flower; The Lady bad take away the foole, therefore I [l. 330] say againe, take her away.
Ol.
331Sir, I bad them take away you.
Clo.
332Misprision in the highest degree. Lady, Cucullus [l. 333] non facit monachum: that's as much to say, as I weare not [l. 334] motley in my braine: good Madona, giue mee leaue to [l. 335] proue you a foole.
Ol.
336Can you do it?
Clo.
337Dexteriously, good Madona.
Ol.
338Make your proofe.
Clo.
339I must catechize you for it Madona, Good my [l. 340] Mouse of vertue answer mee.
Ol.
341Well sir, for want of other idlenesse, Ile bide your [l. 342] proofe.
Clo.
343Good Madona, why mournst thou?
Ol.
344Good foole, for my brothers death.
Clo.
345I thinke his soule is in hell, Madona.
Ol.
346I know his soule is in heauen, foole.
Clo.
347The more foole (Madona) to mourne for your [l. 348] Brothers soule, being in heauen. Take away the Foole, [l. 349] Gentlemen.
Ol.
350What thinke you of this foole Maluolio, doth he [l. 351] not mend?
Mal.
352Yes, and shall do, till the pangs of death shake [l. 353] him: Infirmity that decaies the wise, doth euer make the [l. 354] better foole.
Clow.
355God send you sir, a speedie Infirmity, for the [l. 356] better increasing your folly: Sir Toby will be sworn that [l. 357] I am no Fox, but he wil not passe his word for two pence [l. 358] that you are no Foole.
Ol.
359How say you to that Maluolio?
Mal.
360I maruell your Ladyship takes delight in such [l. 361] a barren rascall: I saw him put down the other day, with [l. 362] an ordinary foole, that has no more braine then a stone. [l. 363] Looke you now, he's out of his gard already: vnles you [l. 364] laugh and minister occasion to him, he is gag'd. I protest [l. 365] I take these Wisemen, that crow so at these set kinde of [l. 366] fooles, no better then the fooles Zanies.
Ol.
367O you are sicke of selfe‑loue Maluolio, and taste [l. 368] with a distemper'd appetite. To be generous, guiltlesse, [l. 369] and of free disposition, is to take those things for Bird‑ [l. 370] bolts, that you deeme Cannon bullets: There is no slan [l. 371] der in an allow'd foole, though he do nothing but rayle; [l. 372] nor no rayling, in a knowne discreet man, though hee do [l. 373] nothing but reproue.
Clo.
374Now Mercury indue thee with leasing, for thou [l. 375] speak'st well of fooles.
Mar.
376Madam, there is at the gate, a young Gentle [l. 377] man, much desires to speake with you.
Ol.
378From the Count Orsino, is it?
Ma
379I know not (Madam) 'tis a faire young man, and [l. 380] well attended.
Ol.
381Who of my people hold him in delay?
Ma.
382Sir Toby Madam, your kinsman.
Ol.
383Fetch him off I pray you, he speakes nothing but [l. 384] madman: Fie on him. Go you Maluolio; If it be a[.] suit [l. 385] from the Count, I am sicke, or not at home. What you [l. 386] will, to dismisse it.
387Now you see sir, how your fooling growes old, & peo [l. 388] ple dislike it.
Clo.
389Thou hast spoke for vs (Madona) as if thy eldest [l. 390] sonne should be a foole: who se scull, Ioue cramme with [l. 391] braines, for heere he comes.
392One of thy kin has a most weake Pia‑mater.
Ol.
393By mine honor halfe drunke. What is he at the [l. 394] gate Cosin?
To.
395A Gentleman.
Ol.
396A Gentleman? What Gentleman?
To.
397'Tis a Gentleman heere. A plague o'these pickle [l. 398] herring: How now Sot.
Clo.
399Good Sir Toby.
Ol.
400Cosin, Cosin, how haue you come so earely by [l. 401] this Lethargie?
To.
402Letcherie, I defie Letchery: there's one at the [l. 403] gate.
Ol.
404I marry, what is he?
To.
405Let him be the diuell and he will, I care not: giue [l. 406] me faith say I. Well, it's all one.
Ol.
407What's a drunken man like, foole?
Clo.
408Like a drown'd man, a foole, and a madde man: [l. 409] One draught aboue heate, makes him a foole, the second [l. 410] maddes him, and a third drownes him.
Ol.
411Go thou and seeke the Crowner, and let him sitte [l. 412] o'my Coz: for he's in the third degree of drinke: hee's [l. 413] drown'd: go looke after him.
Clo.
414He is but mad yet Madona, and the foole shall [l. 415] looke to the madman.
Mal.
416Madam, yond young fellow sweares hee will [l. 417] speake with you. I told him you were sicke, he takes on [l. 418] him to vnderstand so much, and therefore comes to speak [l. 419] with you. I told him you were asleepe, he seems to haue [l. 420] a fore knowledge of that too, and therefore comes to [l. 421] speake with you. What is to be said to him Ladie, hee's [l. 422] fortified against any deniall.
Ol.
423Tell him, he shall not speake with me.
Mal.
424Ha's beene told so: and hee sayes hee'l stand at [l. 425] your doore like a Sheriffes post, and be the supporter to [l. 426] a bench, but hee'l speake with you.
Ol.
427What kinde o'man is he?
Mal.
428Why of mankinde.
Ol.
429What manner of man?
Mal.
430Of verie ill manner: hee'l speake with you, will [l. 431] you, or no.
Ol.
432Of what personage, and yeeres is he?
Mal.
433Not yet old enough for a man, nor yong enough [l. 434] for a boy: as a squash is before tis a pescod, or a Codling [l. 435] when tis almost an Apple: Tis with him in standing wa [l. 436] ter, betweene boy and man. He is verie well‑fauour'd, [l. 437] and he speakes verie shrewishly: One would thinke his [l. 438] mothers milke were scarse out of him.
Ol.
439Let him approach: Call in my Gentlewoman.
Mal.
440Gentlewoman, my Lady calles.
Ol.
Vio.
443The honorable Ladie of the house, which is she?
Ol.
444Speake to me, I shall answer for her: your will.
Vio.
445Most radiant, exquisite, and vnmatchable beau [l. 446] tie. I pray you tell me if this bee the Lady of the house, [l. 447] for I neuer saw her. I would bee loath to cast away my [l. 448] speech: for besides that it is excellently well pend, I haue [l. 449] taken great paines to con it. Good Beauties, let mee su [l. 450] staine no scorne; I am very comptible, euen to the least [l. 451] sinister vsage.
Ol.
452Whence came you sir?
Vio.
453I can say little more then I haue studied, & that [l. 454] question's out of my part. Good gentle one, giue mee [l. 455] modest assurance, if you be the Ladie of the house, that
I [p. 259] Twelfe Night, or, What you will.![[p. 259]](FFimg:axc0279-0.jpg){kind=link}
456I may proceede in my speech.
Ol.
457Are you a Comedian?
Vio.
458No my profound heart: and yet (by the verie [l. 459] phangs of malice, I sweare) I am not that I play. Are you [l. 460] the Ladie of the house?
Ol.
461If I do not vsurpe my selfe, I am.
Vio.
462Most certaine, if you are she, you do vsurp your [l. 463] selfe: for what is yours to bestowe, is, not yours to re [l. 464] serue. But this is from my Commission: I will on with [l. 465] my speech in your praise, and then shew you the heart of [l. 466] my message.
Ol.
467Come to what is important in't: I forgiue you [l. 468] the praise.
Vio.
469Alas, I tooke great paines to studie it, and 'tis [l. 470] Poeticall.
Ol.
471It is the more like to be feigned, I pray you keep [l. 472] it in. I heard you were sawcy at my gates, & allowd your [l. 473] approach rather to wonder at you, then to heare you. If [l. 474] you be not mad, be gone: if you haue reason, be breefe: [l. 475] 'tis not that time of Moone with me, to make one in so [l. 476] skipping a dialogue.
Ma.
477Will you hoyst sayle sir, here lies your way.
Vio.
478No good swabber, I am to hull here a little lon [l. 479] ger. Some mollification for your Giant, sweete Ladie; [l. 480] tell me your minde, I am a messenger.
Ol.
481Sure you haue some hiddeous matter to deliuer, [l. 482] when the curtesie of it is so fearefull. Speake your office.
Vio.
483It alone concernes your eare: I bring no ouer [l. 484] ture of warre, no taxation of homage; I hold the Olyffe [l. 485] in my hand: my words are as full of peace, as matter.
Ol.
486Yet you began rudely. What are you? [l. 487] What would you[…]
Vio.
488The rudenesse that hath appear'd in mee, haue I [l. 489] learn'd from my entertainment. What I am, and what I [l. 490] would, are as secret as maiden‑head: to your eares, Di [l. 491] uinity; to any others, prophanation.
Ol.
492Giue vs the place alone,
493We will heare this diuinitie. Now sir, what is your text?
Vio.
494Most sweet Ladie.
Ol.
495A comfortable doctrine, and much may bee saide [l. 496] of it. Where lies your Text?
Vio.
497In Orsinoes bosome.
Ol.
498In his bosome? In what chapter of his bosome?
Vio.
499To answer by the method in the first of his hart.
Ol.
500O, I haue read it: it is heresie. Haue you no more [l. 501] to say?
Vio.
502Good Madam, let me see your face.
Ol.
503Haue you any Commission from your Lord, to [l. 504] negotiate with my face: you are now out of your Text: [l. 505] but we will draw the Curtain, and shew you the picture. [l. 506] Looke you sir, such a one I was this present: Ist not well [l. 507] done?
Vio.
508Excellently done, if God did all.
Ol.
509'Tis in graine sir, 'twill endure winde and wea [l. 510] ther.
Vio.
Ol.
516O sir, I will not be so hard‑hearted: I will giue [l. 517] out diuers scedules of my beautie. It shalbe Inuentoried [l. 518] and euery particle and vtensile labell'd to my will: As, [l. 519] Item two lippes indifferent redde, Item two grey eyes, [l. 520] with lids to them: Item, one necke, one chin, & so forth. [l. 521] Were you sent hither to praise me?
Vio.
Ol.
527How does he loue me?
Vio.
Ol.
Vio.
Ol.
541Why, what would you?
Vio.
Ol.
Vio.
Ol.
Vio.
Ol.
Mal.
576Heere Madam, at your seruice.
Ol.
Mal.
Ol.
![[p. 260]](FFimg:axc0280-0.jpg){kind=link}
Finis, Actus primus.
Actus Secundus, Scæna prima.
[Act 2, Scene 1]
Ant.
589Will you stay no longer: nor will you not that [l. 590] I go with you.
Seb.
591By your patience, no: my starres shine darkely [l. 592] ouer me; the malignancie of my fate, might perhaps di [l. 593] temper yours; therefore I shall craue of you your leaue, [l. 594] that I may beare my euils alone. It were a bad recom [l. 595] pence for your loue, to lay any of them on you.
An.
596Let me yet know of you, whither you are bound.
Seb.
597No sooth sir: my determinate voyage is meere [l. 598] extrauagancie. But I perceiue in you so excellent a touch [l. 599] of modestie, that you will not extort from me, what I am [l. 600] willing to keepe in: therefore it charges me in manners, [l. 601] the rather to expresse my selfe: you must know of mee [l. 602] then Antonio, my name is Sebastian (which I call'd Rodo [l. 603] rigo) my father was that Sebastian of Messaline, whom I [l. 604] know you haue heard of. He left behinde him, my selfe, [l. 605] and a sister, both borne in an houre: if the Heauens had [l. 606] beene pleas'd, would we had so ended. But you sir, al [l. 607] tered that, for some houre before you tooke me from the [l. 608] breach of the sea, was my sister drown'd.
Ant.
609Alas the day.
Seb.
610A Lady sir, though it[.]was said shee much resem [l. 611] bled me, was yet of many accounted beautiful: but thogh [l. 612] I could not with such estimable wonder ouer‑farre be [l. 613] leeue that, yet thus farre I will boldly publish her, shee [l. 614] bore a minde that enuy could not but call faire: Shee is [l. 615] drown'd already sir with salt water, though I seeme to [l. 616] drowne her remembrance againe with more.
Ant.
617Pardon me sir, your bad entertainment.
Seb.
618O good Antonio, forgiue me your trouble.
Ant.
619If you will not murther me for my loue, let m[.]e [l. 620] be your seruant.
Seb.
621If you will not vndo what you haue done, that is [l. 622] kill him, whom you haue recouer'd, desire it not. Fare [l. 623] ye well at once, my bosome is full of kindnesse, and I [l. 624] am yet so neere the manners of my mother, that vpon the [l. 625] least occasion more, mine eyes will tell tales of me: I am [l. 626] bound to the Count Orsino's Court, farewell.
Ant.
Scæna Secunda.
[Act 2, Scene 2]
Mal.
632Were not you eu'n now, with the Countesse O [l. 633] liuia?
Vio.
634Euen now sir, on a moderate pace, I haue since a [l. 635] riu'd but hither.
Mal.
636She returnes this Ring to you (sir) you might [l. 637] haue saued mee my paines, to haue taken it away your [l. 638] selfe. She adds moreouer, that you should put your Lord
639into a desperate assurance, she will none of him. And one [l. 640] thing more, that you be neuer so hardie to come againe [l. 641] in his affaires, vnlesse it bee to report your Lords taking [l. 642] of this: receiue it so.
Vio.
643She tooke the Ring of me, Ile none of it.
Mal.
644Come sir, you peeuishly threw it to her: and [l. 645] her will is, it should be so return'd: If it bee worth stoo [l. 646] ping for, there it lies, in your eye: if not, bee it his that [l. 647] findes it.
Vio.
Scœna Tertia.
[Act 2, Scene 3]
To.
673Approach Sir Andrew: not to bee a bedde after [l. 674] midnight, is to be vp betimes, and Deliculo surgere, thou [l. 675] know'st.
And.
676Nay by my troth I know not: but I know, to [l. 677] be vp late, is to be vp late.
To.
678A false conclusion: I hate it as an vnfill'd Canne. [l. 679] To be vp after midnight, and to go to bed then is early: [l. 680] so that to go to bed after midnight, is to goe to bed be [l. 681] times. Does not our liues consist of the foure Ele [l. 682] ments?
And.
683Faith so they say, but I thinke it rather consists [l. 684] of eating and drinking.
To.
685Th'art a scholler; let vs therefore eate and drinke [l. 686] Marian I say, a stoope of wine.
And.
687Heere comes the foole yfaith.
Clo.
688How now my harts: Did you neuer see the Pic [l. 689] ture of we three?
To.
690Welcome asse, now let's haue a catch.
And.
691By my troth the foole has an excellent breast. I [l. 692] had rather then forty shillings I had such a legge, and so [l. 693] sweet a breath to sing, as the foole has. Insooth thou wast [l. 694] in very gracious fooling last night, when thou spok'st of [l. 695] Pigrogromitus, of the Vapians pasing the Equinoctial of [l. 696] Queubus: 'twas very good yfaith: I sent thee sixe pence
for [p. 261] Twelfe Night, or, What you will.![[p. 261]](FFimg:axc0281-0.jpg){kind=link}
697for thy Lemon, hadst it?
Clo.
698I did impeticos thy gratillity: for Maluolios nose [l. 699] is no Whip‑stocke. My Lady has a white hand, and the [l. 700] Mermidons are no bottle‑ale houses.
An.
701Excellent: Why this is the best fooling, when [l. 702] all is done. Now a song.
To.
703Come on, there is sixe pence for you. Let's haue [l. 704] a song.
An.
705There's a testrill of me too: if one knight giue a
Clo.
706Would you haue a loue‑song, or a song of good [l. 707] life?
To.
708A loue song, a loue song.
An.
709I, I. I care not for good life.
Clowne
An.
716Excellent good, ifaith.
To.
717Good, good.
Clo.
An.
724A mellifluous voyce, as I am true knight.
To.
725A contagious breath.
An.
726Very sweet, and contagious ifaith.
To.
727To heare by the nose, it is dulcet in contagion. [l. 728] But shall we make the Welkin dance indeed? Shall wee [l. 729] rowze the night‑Owle in a Catch, that will drawe three [l. 730] soules out of one Weauer? Shall we do that?
And.
731And you loue me, let's doo't: I am dogge at a [l. 732] Catch.
Clo.
733Byrlady sir, and some dogs will catch well.
An.
734Most c[…]rtaine: Let our Catch be, Thou Knaue.
Clo.
735Hold thy peace, thou Knaue knight. I shall be con [l. 736] strained in't, to call thee knaue, Knight.
An.
737'Tis not the first time I haue constrained one to [l. 738] call me knaue. Begin foole: it begins, Hold thy peace.
Clo.
739I shall neuer begin if I hold my peace.
An.
740Good ifaith: Come begin.
Mar.
741What a catterwalling doe you keepe heere? If [l. 742] my Ladie haue not call'd vp her Steward Maluolio, and [l. 743] bid him turne you out of doores, neuer trust me.
To.
744My Lady's a Catayan, we are politicians, Maluolios [l. 745] a Peg‑a‑ramsie, and Three merry men be wee. Am not I [l. 746] consanguinious? Am I not of her blood: tilly vally. La [l. 747] die, There dwelt a man in Babylon, Lady, Lady.
Clo.
748Beshrew me, the knights in admirable fooling.
An.
749I, he do's well enough if he be dispos'd, and so [l. 750] do I too: he does it with a better grace, but I do it more [l. 751] naturall.
To.
752 O the twelfe day of December.
Mar.
753For the loue o' God peace.
Mal.
754My masters are you mad? Or what are you? [l. 755] Haue you no wit, manners, nor honestie, but to gabble [l. 756] like Tinkers at this time of night? Do yee make an Ale [l. 757] house of my Ladies house, that ye squeak out your Cozi [l. 758] ers Catches without any mitigation or remorse of voice? [l. 759] Is there no respect of place, persons, nor time in you?
To.
760We did keepe time sir in our Catches. Snecke vp.
Mal.
761Sir Toby, I must be round with you. My Lady [l. 762] bad me tell you, that though she harbors you as her kins [l. 763] man, she's nothing ally'd to your disorders. If you can [l. 764] separate your selfe and your misdemeanors, you are wel [l. 765] come to the house: if not, and it would please you to take [l. 766] leaue of her, she is very willing to bid you farewell.
To.
Mar.
768Nay good Sir Toby.
Clo.
Mal.
To.
Clo.
Mal.
773This is much credit to you.
To.
Clo.
To.
Clo.
To.
778Out o' tune sir, ye lye: Art any more then a Stew [l. 779] ard? Dost thou thinke because thou art vertuous, there [l. 780] shall be no more Cakes and Ale?
Clo.
781Yes by Saint Anne, and Ginger shall bee hotte y'th [l. 782] mouth too.
To.
783Th'art i'th right. Goe sir, rub your Chaine with [l. 784] crums. A stope of Wine Maria.
Mal.
785Mistris Mary, if you priz'd my Ladies fauour [l. 786] at any thing more then contempt, you would not giue [l. 787] meanes for this vnciuill rule; she shall know of it by this [l. 788] hand.
Mar.
789Go shake your eares.
An.
790'Twere as good a deede as to drink when a mans [l. 791] a hungrie, to challenge him the field, and then to breake [l. 792] promise with him, and make a foole of him.
To.
793Doo't knight, Ile write thee a Challenge: or Ile [l. 794] deliuer thy indignation to him by word of mouth.
Mar.
795Sweet Sir Toby be patient for to night: Since [l. 796] the youth of the Counts was to day with my Lady, she is [l. 797] much out of quiet. For Monsieur Maluolio, let me alone [l. 798] with him: If I do not gull him into an ayword, and make [l. 799] him a common recreation, do not thinke I haue witte e [l. 800] nough to lye straight in my bed: I know I can do it.
To.
801Possesse vs, possesse vs, tell vs something of him.
Mar.
802Marrie sir, sometimes he is a kinde of Puritane.
An.
803O, if I thought that, Ide beate him like a dogge.
To.
804What for being a Puritan, thy exquisite reason, [l. 805] deere knight.
An.
806I haue no exquisite reason for't, but I haue reason [l. 807] good enough.
Mar.
808The diu'll a Puritane that hee is, or any thing [l. 809] constantly but a time‑pleaser, an affection'd Asse, that [l. 810] cons State without booke, and vtters it by great swarths. [l. 811] The best perswaded of himselfe: so cram'd (as he thinkes) [l. 812] with excellencies, that it is his grounds of faith, that all [l. 813] that looke on him, loue him: and on that vice in him, will [l. 814] my reuenge finde notable cause to worke.
To.
815What wilt thou do?
Mar.
816I will drop in his way some obscure Epistles of [l. 817] loue, wherein by the colour of his beard, the shape of his [l. 818] legge, the manner of his gate, the expressure of his eye, [l. 819] forehead, and complection, he shall finde himselfe most [l. 820] feelingly personated. I can write very like my Ladie [l. 821] your Neece, on a forgotten matter wee can hardly make [l. 822] distinction of our hands.
To.
823Excellent, I smell a deuice.
An.
824I hau't in my nose too.
To.
825He shall thinke by the Letters that thou wilt drop
that [p. 262] Twelfe Night, or, What you will.![[p. 262]](FFimg:axc0282-0.jpg){kind=link}
826that they come from [.]my Neece, and[.] that shee's in loue [l. 827] with him.
Mar.
828My purpose is indeed a horse of that colour.
An.
829And your horse now would make him an Asse.
Mar.
830Asse, I doubt not.
An.
831O twill be admirable.
Mar.
832Sport royall I warrant you: I know my Phy [l. 833] sicke will worke with him, I will plant you two, and let [l. 834] the Foole make a third, where he shall finde the Letter: [l. 835] obserue his construction of it: For this night to bed, and [l. 836] dreame on the euent: Farewell.
To.
837Good night Penthisilea.
An.
838Before me she's a good wench.
To.
839She's a beagle true bred, and one that adores me: [l. 840] what o'that?
An.
841I was ador'd once too.
To.
842Let's to bed knight: Thou hadst neede send for [l. 843] more money.
An.
844If I cannot recouer your Neece, I am a foule way [l. 845] out.
To.
846Send for money knight, if thou hast her not i'th [l. 847] end, call me Cut.
An.
848If I do not, neuer trust me, take it how you will.
To.
849Come, come, Ile go burne some Sacke, tis too late [l. 850] to go to bed now: Come knight, come knight.
Scena Quarta.
[Act 2, Scene 4]
Du.
Cur.
858He is not heere (so please your Lordshippe) that [l. 859] should sing it?
Du.
860Who was it?
Cur.
861Feste the Iester my Lord, a foole that the Ladie [l. 862] Oliuiaes Father tooke much delight in. He is about the [l. 863] house.
Du.
864Seeke him out, and play the tune the while.
Vio.
Du.
Vio.
Du.
Vio.
Du.
Vio.
881About your yeeres my Lord.
Du.
Vio.
889I thinke it well my Lord.
Du.
Vio.
Du.
Clo.
Duke.
Du.
Clo.
918No paines sir, I take pleasure in singing sir.
Du.
Clo.
920Truely sir, and pleasure will be paide one time, or [l. 921] another.
Du.
Clo.
923Now the melancholly God protect thee, and the [l. 924] Tailor make thy doublet of changeable Taffata, for thy [l. 925] minde is a very Opall. I would haue men of such constan [l. 926] cie put to Sea, that their businesse might be euery thing, [l. 927] and their intent euerie where, for that's it, that alwayes [l. 928] makes a good voyage of nothing. Farewell.
Du.
Vio.
937But if she cannot loue you sir.
Du.
938It cannot be so answer'd.
Vio.
Du.
![[p. 263]](FFimg:axc0283-0.jpg){kind=link}
Vio.
Du.
Vio.
Du.
Vio.
Du.
Vio.
Du.
Scena Quinta.
[Act 2, Scene 5]
To.
979Come thy wayes Signior Fabian.
Fab.
980Nay Ile come: if I loose a scruple of this sport, [l. 981] let me be boyl'd to death with Melancholly.
To.
982Wouldst thou not be glad to haue the niggard [l. 983] ly Rascally sheepe‑biter, come by some notable shame?
Fa.
984I would exult man: you know he brought me out [l. 985] o'fauour with my Lady, about a Beare‑baiting heere.
To.
986To anger him wee'l haue the Beare againe, and [l. 987] we will foole him blacke and blew, shall we not sir An [l. 988] drew?
An.
989And we do not, it is pittie of our liues.
To.
990Heere comes the little villaine: How now my [l. 991] Mettle of India?
Mar.
992Get ye all three into the box tree: Maluolio's [l. 993] comming downe this walke, he has beene yonder i'the [l. 994] Sunne practising behauiour to his own shadow this halfe [l. 995] houre: obserue him for the loue of Mockerie: for I know [l. 996] this Letter wil make a contemplatiue Ideot of him. Close [l. 997] in the name of ieasting, lye thou there: for heere comes [l. 998] the Trowt, that must be caught with tickling.
Mal.
999'Tis but Fortune, all is fortune. Maria once [l. 1000] told me she did affect me, and I haue heard her self come [l. 1001] thus neere, that should shee fancie, it should bee one of [l. 1002] my complection. Besides she vses me with a more ex [l. 1003] alted respect, then any one else that followes her. What [l. 1004] should I thinke on't?
To.
1005Heere's an ouer‑weening rogue.
Fa.
1006Oh peace: Contemplation makes a rare Turkey [l. 1007] Cocke of him, how he iets vnder his aduanc'd plumes.
And.
1008Slight I could so beate the Rogue.
To.
1009Peace I say.
Mal.
1010To be Count Maluolio.
To.
1011Ah Rogue.
An.
1012Pistoll him, pistoll him.
To.
1013Peace, peace.
Mal.
1014There is example for't: The Lady of the Stra [l. 1015] chy, married the yeoman of the wardrobe.
An.
1016Fie on him Iezabel.
Fa.
1017O peace, now he's deepely in: looke how imagi [l. 1018] nation blowes him.
Mal.
1019Hauing beene three moneths married to her, [l. 1020] sitting in my state.
To.
1021O for a stone‑bow to hit him in the eye.
Mal.
1022Calling my Officers about me, in my branch'd [l. 1023] Veluet gowne: hauing come from a day bedde, where I [l. 1024] haue left Oliuia sleeping.
To.
1025Fire and Brimstone.
Fa.
1026O peace, peace.
Mal.
1027And then to haue the humor of state: and after [l. 1028] a demure trauaile of regard: telling them I knowe my [l. 1029] place, as I would they should doe theirs: to aske for my [l. 1030] kinsman Toby.
To.
1031Boltes and shackles.
Fa.
1032Oh peace, peace, peace, now, now.
Mal.
1033Seauen of my people with an obedient start, [l. 1034] make out for him: I frowne the while, and perchance [l. 1035] winde vp my watch, or play with my some rich Iewell: [l. 1036] Toby approaches; curtsies there to me.
To.
1037Shall this fellow liue?
Fa.
1038Though our silence be drawne from vs with cars, [l. 1039] yet peace.
Mal.
familiar smile with an austere regard of controll.
To.
1041And do's not Toby take you a blow o'the lippes, [l. 1042] then?
Mal.
1043Saying, Cosine Toby, my Fortunes hauing cast [l. 1044] me on your Neece, giue me this prerogatiue of speech.
To.
1045What, what?
Mal.
1046You must amend your drunkennesse.
To.
1047Out scab.
Fab.
1048Nay patience, or we breake the sinewes of our [l. 1049] plot?
Mal.
1050Besides you waste the treasure of your time, [l. 1051] with a foolish knight.
And.
1052That's mee I warrant you.
Mal.
1053One sir Andrew.
And.
1054I knew 'twas I, for many do call mee foole.
Mal.
1055What employment haue we heere?
Fa.
1056Now is the Woodcocke neere the gin.
To.
1057Oh peace, and the spirit of humors intimate rea [l. 1058] ding aloud to him.
Mal.
1059By my life this is my Ladies hand: these bee her
[l. 1060] very C s, her V's, and her T's, and thus makes shee het her
[l. 1061] great P's. It is in contempt of question her hand.
An.
1062Her C's, her V's, and her T's: why that?
Mal.
1063To the vnknowne belou'd, this, and my good Wishes: [l. 1064] Her very Phrases: By your leaue wax. Soft, and the im [l. 1065] pressure her Lucrece, with which she vses to seale: tis my [l. 1066] Lady: To whom should this be?
Fab.
1067This winnes him, Liuer and all.
![[p. 264]](FFimg:axc0284-0.jpg){kind=link}
Mal.
1068Ioue knowes I loue, but who, Lips do not mooue, no [l. 1069] man must know. No man must know. What followes? [l. 1070] The numbers alter d: No man must know, [l. 1071] If this should be thee Maluolio?
To.
1072Marrie hang thee brocke.
Mal.
cresse knife:
sway my life.
Fa.
1075A fustian riddle.
To.
1076Excellent Wench, say I.
Mal.
1077M.O.A.I. doth sway my life. Nay but first [l. 1078] let me see, let me see, let me see.
Fab.
1079What dish a poyson has she drest him?
To.
1080And with what wing the stallion checkes at it?
Mal.
1081I may command, where I adore: Why shee may [l. 1082] command me: I serue her, she is my Ladie. Why this is [l. 1083] euident to any formall capacitie. There is no obstruction [l. 1084] in this, and the end: What should that Alphabeticall po [l. 1085] sition portend, if I could make that resemble something [l. 1086] in me? Softly, M.O.A.I.
To.
1087O I, make vp that, he is now at a cold sent.
Fab.
1088Sowter will cry vpon't for all this, though it bee [l. 1089] as ranke as a Fox.
Mal.
1090M. Maluolio, M: why that begins my name.
Fab.
1091Did not I say he would worke it out, the Curre [l. 1092] is excellent at faults.
Mal.
1093M. But then there is no consonancy in the sequell [l. 1094] that suffers vnder probation: A. should follow, but O. [l. 1095] does.
Fa.
1096And O shall end, I hope.
To.
1097I, or Ile cudgell him, and make him cry O.
Mal.
1098And then I. comes behind.
Fa.
1099I, and you had any eye behinde you, you might [l. 1100] see more detraction at your heeles, then Fortunes before [l. 1101] you.
Mal.
1102M,O,A,I. This simulation is not as the former: [l. 1103] and yet to crush this a little, it would bow to mee, for e [l. 1104] uery one of these Letters are in my name. Soft, here fol [l. 1105] lowes prose: If this fall into thy hand, reuolue. In my stars [l. 1106] I am aboue thee, but be not affraid of greatnesse: Some [l. 1107] are become great, some atcheeues greatnesse, and[.] some [l. 1108] haue greatnesse thrust vppon em. Thy fates open theyr [l. 1109] hands, let thy blood and spirit embrace them, and to in [l. 1110] ure thy selfe to what thou art like to be:cast thy humble [l. 1111] slough, and appeare fresh. Be opposite with a kinsman, [l. 1112] surly with seruants: Let thy tongue tang arguments of [l. 1113] state; put thy selfe into the tricke of singularitie. Shee [l. 1114] thus aduises thee, that sighes for thee. Remember who [l. 1115] commended thy yellow stockings, and wish'd to see thee [l. 1116] euer crosse garter'd: I say remember, goe too, thou art [l. 1117] made if thou desir'st to be so: If not, let me see thee a ste [l. 1118] ward still, the fellow of seruants, and not woorthie to [l. 1119] touch Fortunes fingers Farewell, Shee that would alter [l. 1120] seruices with thee, the fortunate vnhappy daylight and [l. 1121] champian discouers not more: This is open, I will bee [l. 1122] proud, I will reade politicke Authours, I will baffle Sir [l. 1123] Toby, I will wash off grosse acquaintance, I will be point [l. 1124] deuise, the very man. I do not now foole my selfe, to let [l. 1125] imagination iade mee; for euery reason excites to this, [l. 1126] that my Lady loues mè. She did commend my yellow [l. 1127] stockings of late, shee did praise my legge being crosse‑ [l. 1128] garter'd, and in this she manifests her selfe to my loue, & [l. 1129] with a kinde of iniunction driues mee to these habites of [l. 1130] her liking. I thanke my starres, I am happy: I will bee [l. 1131] strange, stout, in yellow stockings, and crosse Garter'd, [l. 1132] euen with the swiftnesse of putting on. Ioue, and my [l. 1133] starres be praised. Heere is yet a postscript. Thou canst [l. 1134] not choose but know who I am. If thou entertainst my loue, let [l. 1135] it appeare in thy smiling, thy smiles become thee well. There [l. 1136] fore in my presence still smile, deere my sweete, I prethee. Ioue [l. 1137] I thanke thee, I will smile, I wil do euery thing that thou [l. 1138] wilt haue me.
Fab.
1139I will not giue my part of this sport for a pensi [l. 1140] on of thousands to be paid from the Sophy.
To.
1141I could marry this wench for this deuice.
An.
1142So could I too.
To.
1143And aske no other dowry with her, but such ano [l. 1144] ther iest.
An.
1145Nor I neither.
Fab.
1146Heere comes my noble gull catcher.
To.
1147Wilt thou set thy foote o'my necke.
An.
1148Or o'mine either?
To.
1149Shall I play my freedome at tray‑trip, and becom [l. 1150] thy bondslaue?
An.
1151Ifaith, or I either?
Tob.
1152Why, thou hast put him in such a dreame, that [l. 1153] when the image of it leaues him, he must run mad.
Ma.
1154Nay but say true, do's it worke vpon him?
To.
1155Like Aqua vite with a Midwife.
Mar.
1156If you will then see the fruites of the sport, mark [l. 1157] his first approach before my Lady: hee will come to her [l. 1158] in yellow stockings, and 'tis a colour she abhorres, and [l. 1159] crosse garter'd, a fashion shee detests: and hee will smile [l. 1160] vpon her, which will now be so vnsuteable to her dispo [l. 1161] sition, being addicted to a melancholly, as shee is, that it [l. 1162] cannot but turn him into a notable contempt: if you wil [l. 1163] see it follow me.
To.
1164To the gates of Tartar, thou most excellent diuell [l. 1165] of wit.
And.
1166Ile make one too.
Finis Actus secundus
Actus Tertius, Scæna prima.
[Act 3, Scene 1]
Vio.
1167Saue thee Friend and thy Musick: dost thou liue [l. 1168] by thy Tabor?
Clo.
1169No sir, I liue by the Church.
Vio.
1170Art thou a Churchman?
Clo.
1171No such matter sir, I do liue by the Church: For, [l. 1172] I do liue at my house, and my house dooth stand by the [l. 1173] Church.
Vio.
1174So thou maist say the Kings lyes by a begger, if a [l. 1175] begger dwell neer him: or the Church stands by thy Ta [l. 1176] bor, if thy Tabor stand by the Church.
Clo.
1177You haue said sir: To see this age: A sentence is [l. 1178] but a cheu'rill gloue to a good witte, how quickely the [l. 1179] wrong side may be turn'd outward.
Vio.
1180Nay that's certaine: they that dally nicely with [l. 1181] words, may quickely make them wanton.
Clo.
1182I would therefore my sister had had no name Sir.
Vio.
1183Why man?
Clo.
1184Why sir, her names a word, and to dallie with [l. 1185] that word, might make my sister wanton: But indeede, [l. 1186] words are very Rascals, since bonds disgrac'd them.
Vio.
1187Thy reason man?
![[p. 273]](FFimg:axc0285-0.jpg){kind=link}
Clo.
1188Troth sir, I can yeeld you none without wordes, [l. 1189] and wordes are growne so false, I am loath to proue rea [l. 1190] son with them.
Vio.
1191I warrant thou art a merry fellow, and car'st for [l. 1192] nothing.
Clo.
1193Not so sir, I do care for something: but in my con [l. 1194] science sir, I do not care for you: if that be to care for no [l. 1195] thing sir, I would it would make you inuisible.
Vio.
1196Art not thou the Lady Oliuia's foole?
Clo.
1197No indeed sir, the Lady Oliuia has no folly, shee [l. 1198] will keepe no foole sir, till she be married, and fooles are [l. 1199] as like husbands, as Pilchers are to Herrings, the Hus [l. 1200] bands the bigger, I am indeede not her foole, but hir cor [l. 1201] rupter of words.
Vio.
1202I saw thee late at the Count Orsino's.
Clo.
1203Foolery sir, does walke about the Orbe like the [l. 1204] sun, it shines euery where. I would be sorry sir, but the [l. 1205] foole should be as oft with your Master, as with my Mi [l. 1206] stris: I thinke I saw your wisedome there.
Vio.
1207Nay, and thou passe vpon me, Ile no more with [l. 1208] thee Hold there's expences for thee.
Clo.
1209Now Ioue in his next commodity of hayre, send [l. 1210] thee a beard.
Vio.
1211By my troth Ile tell thee, I am almost sicke for [l. 1212] one, though I would not haue it grow on my chinne. Is [l. 1213] my Lady within?
Clo
1214 Would not a paire of these haue bred sir?
Vio.
1215Yes being kept together, and put to vse.
Clo.
1216I would play Lord Pandarus of Phrygia sir, to bring [l. 1217] a Cresssida to this Troylus.
Vio.
1218I vnderstand you sir, tis well begg'd.
Clo.
1219The matter I hope is not great sir; begging, but a [l. 1220] begger: Cresssida was a begger. My Lady is within sir. I [l. 1221] will conster to them whence you come, who you are, and [l. 1222] what you would are out of my welkin, I might say Ele [l. 1223] ment, but the word is ouer‑worne.
Vio.
To.
1233Saue you Gentleman.
Vio.
1234And you sir.
And.
1235Dieu vou guard Monsieur.
Vio.
1236Et vouz ousie vostre seruiture.
An.
1237I hope sir, you are, and I am yours.
To.
1238Will you incounter the house, my Neece is desi [l. 1239] rous you should enter, if your trade be to her.
Vio.
1240I am bound to your Neece sir, I meane she is the [l. 1241] list of my voyage.
To.
1242Taste your legges sir, put them to motion.
Vio.
1243My legges do better vnderstand me sir, then I vn [l. 1244] derstand what you meane by bidding me taste my legs.
To.
1245I meane to go sir, to enter.
Vio.
1246I will answer you with gate and entrance, but we [l. 1247] are preuented.
1248Most excellent accomplish'd Lady, the heauens raine O [l. 1249] dours on you.
And.
1250That youth's a rare Courtier, raine odours, wel.
Vio.
1251My matter hath no voice Lady, but to your owne [l. 1252] most pregnant and vouchsafed eare.
And.
1253Odours, pregnant, and vouchsafed: Ile get 'em [l. 1254] all three already.
Ol.
1255Let the Garden doore be shut, and leaue mee to [l. 1256] my hearing. Giue me your hand sir.
Vio.
Ol.
Vio.
Ol.
Vio.
Ol.
Vio.
Ol.
Vio.
Ol.
Vio.
Ol.
Vio.
Ol.
Vio.
Ol.
Vio.
Ol.
Vio.
Ol.
Vio.
Ol.
![[p. 266]](FFimg:axc0286-0.jpg){kind=link}
Vio.
Ol.
Scœna Secunda.
[Act 3, Scene 2]
And.
1330No faith, Ile not stay a iot longer:
To.
1331Thy reason deere venom, giue thy reason.
Fab.
1332You must needes yeelde your reason, Sir An [l. 1333] drew?
And.
1334Marry I saw your Neece do more fauours to the [l. 1335] Counts Seruing‐man, then euer she bestow'd vpon mee: [l. 1336] I saw't i'th Orchard.
To.
1337Did she see the while, old boy, tell me that.
And.
1338As plaine as I see you now.
Fab.
1339This was a great argument of loue in her toward [l. 1340] you.
And.
1341S'light; will you make an Asse o'me.
Fab.
1342I will proue it legitimate sir, vpon the Oathes of [l. 1343] iudgement, and reason.
To.
1344And they haue beene grand Iurie men, since before [l. 1345] Noah was a Saylor.
Fab.
1346Shee did shew fauour to the youth in your sight, [l. 1347] onely to exasperate you, to awake your dormouse valour, [l. 1348] to put fire in your Heart, and brimstone in your Liuer: [l. 1349] you should then haue accosted her, and with some excel [l. 1350] lent iests, fire‑new from the mint, you should haue bangd [l. 1351] the youth into dumbenesse: this was look'd for at your [l. 1352] hand, and this was baulkt: the double gilt of this oppor [l. 1353] tunitie you let time wash off, and you are now sayld into [l. 1354] the North of my Ladies opinion, where you will hang [l. 1355] like an ysickle on a Dutchmans beard, vnlesse you do re [l. 1356] deeme it, by some laudable attempt, either of valour or [l. 1357] policie.
And.
1358And't be any way, it must be with Valour, for [l. 1359] policie I hate: I had as liefe be a Brownist, as a Politi [l. 1360] cian.
To.
1361Why then build me thy fortunes vpon the basis of [l. 1362] valour. Challenge me the Counts youth to fight with him [l. 1363] hurt him in eleuen places, my Neece shall take note of it, [l. 1364] and assure thy selfe, there is no loue‑Broker in the world, [l. 1365] can more preuaile in mans commendation with woman, [l. 1366] then report of valour.
Fab.
1367There is no way but this sir Andrew.
An.
1368Will either of you beare me a challenge to him?
To.
1369Go, write it in a martial hand, be curst and briefe: [l. 1370] it is no matter how wittie, so it bee eloquent, and full of [l. 1371] inuention: taunt him with the license of Inke: if thou [l. 1372] thou'st him some thrice, it shall not be amisse, and as ma [l. 1373] ny Lyes, as will lye in thy sheete of paper, although the [l. 1374] sheete were bigge enough for the bedde of Ware in Eng
1375land, set 'em downe, go about it. Let there bee gaulle e [l. 1376] nough in thy inke, though thou write with a Goose‑pen, [l. 1377] no matter: about it.
And.
1378Where shall I finde you?
To.
1379Wee'l call thee at the Cubiculo: Go.
Fa.
1380This is a deere Manakin to you Sir Toby.
To.
1381I haue beene deere to him lad, some two thousand [l. 1382] strong, or so.
Fa.
1383We shall haue a rare Letter from him; but you'le [l. 1384] not deliuer't.
To.
1385Neuer trust me then: and by all meanes stirre on [l. 1386] the youth to an answer. I thinke Oxen and waine‑ropes [l. 1387] cannot hale them together. For Andrew, if he were open'd [l. 1388] and you finde so much blood in his Liuer, as will clog the [l. 1389] foote of a flea, Ile eate the rest of th' anatomy.
Fab.
1390And his opposit the youth beares in his visage no [l. 1391] great presage of cruelty.
To.
1392Looke where the youngest Wren of mine comes.
Mar.
1393If you desire the spleene, and will laughe your [l. 1394] selues into stitches, follow me; yond gull Maluolio is tur [l. 1395] ned Heathen, a verie Renegatho; for there is no christian [l. 1396] that meanes to be saued by beleeuing rightly, can euer [l. 1397] beleeue such imposssible passages of grossenesse. Hee's in [l. 1398] yellow stockings.
To.
1399And crosse garter'd?
Mar.
1400Most villanously: like a Pedant that keepes a [l. 1401] Schoole i'th Church: I haue dogg'd him like his murthe [l. 1402] rer. He does obey euery point of the Letter that I dropt, [l. 1403] to betray him: He does smile his face into more lynes, [l. 1404] then is in the new Mappe, with the augmentation of the [l. 1405] Indies: you haue not seene such a thing as tis: I can hard [l. 1406] ly forbeare hurling things at him, I know my Ladie will [l. 1407] strike him: if shee doe, hee'l smile, and take't for a great [l. 1408] fauour.
To.
1409Come bring vs, bring vs where he is.
Scæna Tertia.
[Act 3, Scene 3]
Seb.
Ant.
Seb.
![[p. 267]](FFimg:axc0287-0.jpg){kind=link}
Ant.
Seb.
Ant.
Seb.
Ant.
Seb.
Ant.
Seb.
Ant.
Seb.
Ant.
Seb.
Scœna Quarta.
[Act 3, Scene 4]
Ol.
Mar.
Ol.
Mar.
1472No Madam, he does nothing but smile: your La [l. 1473] dyship were best to haue some guard about you, if hee [l. 1474] come, for sure the man is tainted in's wits.
Ol.
Mal.
Ol.
Mal.
Mal.
Mal.
1488Not blacke in my minde[.], though yellow in my [l. 1489] legges: It did come to his hands, and Commaunds shall [l. 1490] be executed. I thinke we doe know the sweet Romane [l. 1491] hand.
Ol.
1492Wilt thou go to bed Maluolio?
Mal.
1493To bed? I sweet heart, and Ile come to thee.
Ol.
1494God comfort thee: Why dost thou smile so, and [l. 1495] kisse thy hand so oft?
Mar.
1496How do you Maluolio?
Maluo.
Mar.
1499Why appeare you with this ridiculous bold [l. 1500] nesse before my Lady.
Mal.
1501Be not afraid of greatnesse: 'twas well writ.
Ol.
1502What meanst thou by that Maluolio?
Mal.
1503Some are borne great.
Ol.
1504Ha?
Mal.
1505Some atcheeue greatnesse.
Ol.
1506What sayst thou?
Mal.
1507And some haue greatnesse thrust vpon them.
Ol.
1508Heauen restore thee.
Mal.
1509Remember who commended thy yellow stock [l. 1510] ings.
Ol.
1511Thy yellow stockings?
Mal.
1512And wish'd to see thee crosse garter'd.
Ol.
1513Crosse garter'd?
Mal.
1514Go too, thou art made,[.]if thou desir'st to be so.
Ol.
1515Am I made?
Mal.
1516If not, let me see thee a seruant still.
Ol.
1517Why this is verie Midsommer madnesse.
Ser.
1518Madame, the young Gentleman of the Count [l. 1519] Orsino's is return'd, I could hardly entreate him backe: he [l. 1520] attends your Ladyships pleasure.
Ol.
1521Ile come to him.
1522Good Maria, let this fellow be look d too. Where's my [l. 1523] Cosine Toby, let some of my people haue a speciall care [l. 1524] of him, I would not haue him miscarrie for the halfe of [l. 1525] my Dowry.
Mal.
1526Oh ho, do you come neere me now: no worse [l. 1527] man then sir Toby to looke to me. This concurres direct [l. 1528] ly with the Letter, she sends him on purpose, that I may [l. 1529] appeare stubborne to him: for she incites me to that in [l. 1530] the Letter. Cast thy humble slough sayes she: be oppo [l. 1531] site with a Kinsman, surly with seruants, let thy tongue [l. 1532] langer with arguments of state, put thy selfe into the [l. 1533] tricke of singularity: and consequently setts downe the [l. 1534] manner how: as a sad face, a reuerend carriage, a slow [l. 1535] tongue, in the habite of some Sir of note, and so foorth. [l. 1536] I haue lymde her, but it is Ioues doing, and Ioue make me [l. 1537] thankefull. And when she went away now, let this Fel [l. 1538] low be look'd too: Fellow? not Maluolio, nor after my [l. 1539] degree, but Fellow. Why euery thing adheres togither, [l. 1540] that no dramme of a scruple, no scruple of a scruple, no [l. 1541] obstacle, no incredulous or vnsafe circumstance: What [l. 1542] can be saide? Nothing that can be, can come betweene [l. 1543] me, and the full prospect of my hopes. Well Ioue, not I, [l. 1544] is the doer of this, and he is to be thanked.
![[p. 268]](FFimg:axc0288-0.jpg){kind=link}
To.
1545Which way is hee in the name of sanctity. If all [l. 1546] the diuels of hell be drawne in little, and Legion himselfe [l. 1547] possest him, yet Ile speake to him.
Fab.
1548Heere he is, heere he is: how ist with you sir? [l. 1549] How ist with you man?
Mal.
1550Go off, I discard you: let me enioy my priuate: [l. 1551] go off.
Mar.
1552Lo, how hollow the fiend speakes within him; [l. 1553] did not I tell you? Sir Toby, my Lady prayes you to haue [l. 1554] a care of him.
Mal.
1555Ah ha, does she so?
To.
1556Go too, go too: peace, peace, wee must deale [l. 1557] gently with him: Let me alone. How do you Maluolio? [l. 1558] How ist with you? What man, defie the diuell: consider, [l. 1559] he's an enemy to mankinde.
Mal.
1560Do you know what you say?
Mar.
1561La you, and you speake ill of the diuell, how [l. 1562] he takes it at heart. Pray God he be not bewitch'd.
Fab.
1563Carry his water to th'wise woman.
Mar.
1564Marry and it shall be done to morrow morning [l. 1565] if I liue. My Lady would not loose him for more then ile [l. 1566] say.
Mal.
1567How now mistris?
Mar.
1568Oh Lord.
To.
1569Prethee hold thy peace, this is not the way: Doe [l. 1570] you not see you moue him? Let me alone with him.
Fa.
1571No way but gentlenesse, gently, gently: the Fiend [l. 1572] is rough, and will not be roughly vs'd.
To.
1573Why how now my bawcock? how dost yu chuck?
Mal.
1574Sir.
To.
1575I biddy, come with me. What man, tis not for [l. 1576] grauity to play at cherrie‑pit with sathan Hang him foul [l. 1577] Colliar.
Mar.
1578Get him to say his prayers, good sir Toby gette [l. 1579] him to pray.
Mal.
1580My prayers Minx.
Mar.
1581No I warrant you, he will not heare of godly [l. 1582] nesse.
Mal.
1583Go hang your selues all: you are ydle shallowe [l. 1584] things, I am not of your element, you shall knowe more [l. 1585] heereafter.
To.
1586Ist posssible?
Fa.
1587If this were plaid vpon a stage now, I could con [l. 1588] demne it as an improbable fiction.
To.
1589His very genius hath taken the infection of the [l. 1590] deuice man.
Mar.
1591Nay pursue him now, least the deuice take ayre, [l. 1592] and taint.
Fa.
1593Why we shall make him mad indeede.
Mar.
1594The house will be the quieter.
To.
1595Come, wee'l haue him in a darke room & bound. [l. 1596] My Neece is already in the beleefe that he's mad: we may [l. 1597] carry it thus for our pleasure, and his pennance, til our ve [l. 1598] ry pastime tyred out of breath, prompt vs to haue mercy [l. 1599] on him: at which time, we wil bring the deuice to the bar [l. 1600] and crowne thee for a finder of madmen: but see, but see.
Fa.
1601More matter for a May morning.
An.
1602Heere's the Challenge, reade it: I warrant there's [l. 1603] vinegar and pepper in't.
Fab.
1604Ist so sawcy?
And.
1605I, ist? I warrant him: do but read.
To.
1606Giue me.
1607Youth, whatsoeuer thou art, thou art but a scuruy fellow.
Fa.
1608 Good, and valiant.
To.
1609Wonder not, nor admire not in thy minde why I doe call [l. 1610] thee so, for I will shew thee no reason for't.
Fa.
1611A good note, that keepes you from the blow of yͤ [l. 1612] (Law
To.
1613Thou comst to the Lady Oliuia, and in my sight she vses [l. 1614] thee kindly: but thou lyest in thy throat, that is not the matter [l. 1615] I challenge thee for.
Fa.
1616Very breefe, and to exceeding good sence‑lesse.
To.
1617I will way‑lay thee going home, where if it be thy chance [l. 1618] to kill me.
Fa.
1619Good.
To.
1620Thou kilst me like a rogue and a villaine.
Fa.
1621Still you keepe o'th windie side of the Law: good.
Tob.
1622Fartheewell, and God haue mercie vpon one of our [l. 1623] soules. He may haue mercie vpon mine, but my hope is better, [l. 1624] and so looke to thy selfe. Thy friend as thou vsest him, & thy [l. 1625] sworne enemie, Andrew Ague‑cheeke.
To.
1626If this Letter moue him not, his legges cannot: [l. 1627] Ile giu't him.
Mar.
1628You may haue verie fit occasion fot't for't: he is now
[l. 1629] in some commerce with my Ladie, and will by and by
[l. 1630] depart.
To.
1631Go sir Andrew: scout mee for him at the corner [l. 1632] of the Orchard like a bum‑Baylie: so soone as euer thou [l. 1633] seest him, draw, and as thou draw'st, sweare horrible: for [l. 1634] [.]t comes to passe oft, that a terrible oath, with a swagge [l. 1635] ring accent sharpely twang'd off, giues manhoode more [l. 1636] approbation, then euer proofe it selfe would haue earn'd [l. 1637] him. Away.
And.
1638Nay let me alone for swearing.
To.
1639 Now will not I deliuer his Letter: for the behaui [l. 1640] our of the yong Gentleman, giues him out to be of good [l. 1641] capacity, and breeding: his employment betweene his [l. 1642] Lord and my Neece, confirmes no lesse. Therefore, this [l. 1643] Letter being so excellently ignorant, will breed no terror [l. 1644] in the youth: he will finde it comes from a Clodde‑pole. [l. 1645] But sir, I will deliuer his Challenge by word of mouth; [l. 1646] set vpon Ague‑cheeke a notable report of valor, and driue [l. 1647] the Gentleman (as I know his youth will aptly receiue it) [l. 1648] into a most hideous opinion of his rage, skill, furie, and [l. 1649] impetuositie. This will so fright them both, that they wil [l. 1650] kill one another by the looke, like Cockatrices.
Fab.
1651Heere he comes with your Neece, giue them way [l. 1652] till he take leaue, and presently after him.
To.
1653I wil meditate the while vpon some horrid message [l. 1654] for a Challenge.
Ol.
Vio.
Ol.
Vio.
Ol.
Vio.
1670I will acquit you.
Ol.
To.
1673Gentleman, God saue thee.
![[p. 269]](FFimg:axc0289-0.jpg){kind=link}
Vio.
1674And you sir.
To.
1675That defence thou hast, betake the too't: of what [l. 1676] nature the w[.]ongs are thou hast done him, I knowe not: [l. 1677] but thy intercepter full of despight, bloody as the Hun [l. 1678] ter, attends thee at the Orchard end: dismount thy tucke, [l. 1679] be yare in thy preparation, for thy assaylant is quick, skil [l. 1680] full, and deadly.
Vio.
1681You mistake sir I am sure, no man hath any quar [l. 1682] rell to me: my remembrance is very free and cleere from [l. 1683] any image of offence done to any man.
To.
1684You'l finde it otherwise I assure you: therefore, if [l. 1685] you hold your life at any price, betake you to your gard: [l. 1686] for your opposite hath in him what youth, strength, skill, [l. 1687] and wrath, can furnish man withall.
Vio.
1688I pray you sir what is he?
To.
1689He is knight dubb'd with vnhatch'd Rapier, and [l. 1690] on carpet consideration, but he is a diuell in priuate brall, [l. 1691] soules and bodies hath he diuorc'd three, and his incense [l. 1692] ment at this moment is so implacable, that satisfaction [l. 1693] can be none, but by pangs of death and sepulcher: Hob, [l. 1694] nob, is his word: giu't or take't.
Vio.
1695I will returne againe into the house, and desire [l. 1696] some conduct of the Lady. I am no fighter, I haue heard [l. 1697] of some kinde of men, that put quarrells purposely on o [l. 1698] thers, to taste their valour: belike this is a man of that [l. 1699] quirke.
To.
1700Sir, no: his indignation deriues it selfe out of a ve [l. 1701] ry computent iniurie, therefore get you on, and giue him [l. 1702] his desire. Backe you shall not to the house, vnlesse you [l. 1703] vndertake that with me, which with as much safetie you [l. 1704] might answer him: therefore on, or strippe your sword [l. 1705] starke naked: for meddle you must that's certain, or for [l. 1706] sweare to weare iron about you.
Vio.
1707This is as vnciuill as strange. I beseech you doe [l. 1708] me this courteous office, as to know of the Knight what [l. 1709] my offence to him is: it is something of my negligence, [l. 1710] nothing of my purpose.
To.
1711I will doe so. Signiour Fabian, stay you by this [l. 1712] Gentleman, till my returne.
Vio.
1713Pray you sir, do you know of this matter?
Fab.
1714I know the knight is incenst against you, euen to [l. 1715] a mortall arbitrement, but nothing of the circumstance [l. 1716] more.
Vio.
1717I beseech you what manner of man is he?
Fab.
1718Nothing of that wonderfull promise to read him [l. 1719] by his forme, as you are like to finde him in the proofe of [l. 1720] his valour. He is indeede sir, the most skilfull, bloudy, & [l. 1721] fatall opposite that you could posssibly haue found in anie [l. 1722] part of Illyria: will you walke towards him, I will make [l. 1723] your peace with him, if I can.
Vio.
1724I shall bee much bound to you for't: I am one, [l. 1725] that had rather go with sir Priest, then sir knight: I care [l. 1726] not who knowes so much of my mettle.
To.
1727Why man hee s a verie diuell, I haue not seen such [l. 1728] a firago: I had a passe with him, rapier, scabberd, and all: [l. 1729] and he giues me the stucke in with such a mortall motion [l. 1730] that it is ineuitable: and on the answer, he payes you as [l. 1731] surely, as your feete hits the ground they step on. They [l. 1732] say, he has bin Fencer to the Sophy.
And.
1733Pox on't, Ile not meddle with him.
To.
1734I but he will not now be pacified, [l. 1735] Fabian can scarse hold him yonder.
An.
1736Plague on't, and I thought he had beene valiant, [l. 1737] and so cunning in Fence, I'de haue seene him damn'd ere [l. 1738] I'de haue challeng'd him. Let him let the matter slip, and [l. 1739] Ile giue him my horse, gray Capilet.
To.
1740Ile make the motion: stand heere, make a good [l. 1741] shew on't, this shall end without the perdition of soules, [l. 1742] marry Ile ride your horse as well as I ride you.
1743I haue his horse to take vp the quarrell, I haue perswaded [l. 1744] him the youths a diuell.
Fa.
1745He is as horribly conceited of him: and pants, & [l. 1746] lookes pale, as if a Beare were at his heeles.
To.
1747There's no remedie sir, he will fight with you for's [l. 1748] oath sake: marrie hee hath better bethought him of his [l. 1749] quarrell, and hee findes that now scarse to bee worth tal [l. 1750] king of: therefore draw for the supportance of his vowe, [l. 1751] he protests he will not hurt you.
Vio.
1752Pray God defend me: a little thing would make [l. 1753] me tell them how much I lacke of a man.
Fab.
1754Giue ground if you see him furious.
To.
1755Come sir Andrew, there's no remedie, the Gen [l. 1756] tleman will for his honors sake haue one bowt with you: [l. 1757] he cannot by the Duello auoide it: but hee has promised [l. 1758] me, as he is a Gentleman and a Soldiour, he will not hurt [l. 1759] you. Come on, too't.
And.
1760Pray God he keepe his oath.
Vio.
1761I do assure you tis against my will.
Ant.
To.
1765You sir? Why, what are you?
Ant.
To.
1768Nay, if you be an vndertaker, I am for you.
Fab.
1769O good sir Toby hold: heere come the Officers.
To.
1770Ile be with you anon.
Vio.
1771Pray sir, put your sword vp if you please.
And.
1772Marry will I sir: and for that I promis'd you Ile [l. 1773] be as good as my word. Hee will beare you easily, and [l. 1774] raines well.
1. Off.
1775This is the man, do thy Office.
2. Off.
1776Anthonio, I arrest thee at the suit of Count Orsino
An.
1777You do mistake me sir.
1. Off.
Ant.
2 Off.
Ant.
Vio.
Ant.
![[p. 270]](FFimg:axc0290-0.jpg){kind=link}
Vio.
Ant.
2. Off.
Ant.
(heere,
1. Off.
Ant.
1. Off.
Ant.
Vio.
To.
1830Come hither Knight, come hither Fabian: Weel [l. 1831] whisper ore a couplet or two of most sage sawes.
Vio.
To.
1838A very dishonest paltry boy, and more a coward [l. 1839] then a Hare, his dishonesty appeares, in leauing his frend [l. 1840] heere in necesssity, and denying him: and for his coward [l. 1841] ship aske Fabian.
Fab.
1842A Coward, a most deuout Coward, religious in [l. 1843] it.
And.
1844Slid Ile after him againe, and beate him.
To.
1845Do, cuffe him soundly, but neuer draw thy sword
And.
1846And I do not.
Fab.
1847Come, let's see the euent.
To.
1848I dare lay any money, twill be nothing yet.
Actus Quartus, Scæna prima.
[Act 4, Scene 1]
Clo.
1849Will you make me beleeue, that I am not sent for [l. 1850] you?
Seb.
Clo.
1853Well held out yfaith: No, I do not know you, [l. 1854] nor I am not sent to you by my Lady, to bid you come [l. 1855] speake with her: nor your name is not Master Cesario, [l. 1856] nor this is not my nose neyther: Nothing that is so, is so.
Seb.
1857I prethee vent thy folly some‑where else, thou [l. 1858] know'st not me.
Clo.
1859Vent my folly: He has heard that word of some [l. 1860] great man, and now applyes it to a foole. Vent my fol [l. 1861] ly: I am affraid this great lubber the World will proue a [l. 1862] Cockney: I prethee now vngird thy strangenes, and tell [l. 1863] me what I shall vent to my Lady? Shall I vent to hir that [l. 1864] thou art comming?
Seb.
1865I prethee foolish greeke depart from me, there's [l. 1866] money for thee, if you tarry longer, I shall giue worse [l. 1867] paiment.
Clo.
1868By my troth thou hast an open hand: these Wise‑ [l. 1869] men that giue fooles money, get themselues a good re [l. 1870] port, after foureteene yeares purchase.
And.
1871Now sir, haue I met you again: ther's for you.
Seb.
To.
1874Hold sir, or Ile throw your dagger ore the house.
Clo.
1875This will I tell my Lady straight, I would not be [l. 1876] in some of your coats for two pence.
To.
1877Come on sir, hold.
An.
1878Nay let him alone, Ile go another way to worke [l. 1879] with him: Ile haue an action of Battery against him, if [l. 1880] there be any law in Illyria: though I stroke him first, yet [l. 1881] it's no matter for that.
Seb.
1882Let go thy hand.
To.
1883Come sir, I will not let you go. Come my yong [l. 1884] souldier put vp your yron: you are well flesh'd: Come [l. 1885] on.
Seb.
To.
1888What, what? Nay then I must haue an Ounce or [l. 1889] two of this malapert blood from you.
Ol.
1890Hold Toby, on thy life I charge thee hold.
To.
1891Madam.
Ol.
Seb.
Ol.
Seb.
Ol.
Scœna Secunda.
[Act 4, Scene 2]
Mar.
1912 Nay, I prethee put on this gown, & this beard, [l. 1913] make him beleeue thou art sir Topas the Curate, doe it [l. 1914] quickly. Ile call sir Toby the whilst.
Clo.
1915Well, Ile put it on, and I will dissemble my selfe [l. 1916] in't, and I would I were the first that euer dissembled in such [p. 271] Twelfe Night, or, What you will. [l. 1917] in such a gowne. I am not tall enough to become the [l. 1918] function well, nor leane enough to bee thought a good [l. 1919] Studient: but to be said an honest man and a good hous [l. 1920] keeper goes as fairely, as to say, a carefull man, & a great [l. 1921] scholler. The Competitors enter.
![[p. 271]](FFimg:axc0291-0.jpg){kind=link}
To.
1922Ioue blesse thee M. Parson.
Clo.
1923Bonos dies sir Toby: for as the old hermit of Prage [l. 1924] that neuer saw pen and inke, very wittily sayd to a Neece [l. 1925] of King Gorbodacke, that that is, is: so I being M. Parson, [l. 1926] am M. Parson; for what is that, but that? and is, but is?
To.
1927To him sir Topas.
Clow.
1928What hoa, I say, Peace in this prison.
To.
1929The knaue counterfets well: a good knaue.
Mal.
1930Who cals there?
Clo.
1931Sir Topas the Curate, who comes to visit Maluo [l. 1932] lio the Lunaticke.
Mal.
1933Sir Topas, sir Topas, good sir Topas goe to my [l. 1934] Ladie.
Clo.
1935Out hyperbolicall fiend, how vexest thou this [l. 1936] man? Talkest thou nothing but of Ladies?
Tob.
1937Well said M. Parson.
Mal.
1938Sir Topas, neuer was man thus wronged, good [l. 1939] sir Topas do not thinke I am mad: they haue layde mee [l. 1940] heere in hideous darknesse.
Clo.
1941Fye, thou dishonest sathan: I call thee by the [l. 1942] most modest termes, for I am one of those gentle ones, [l. 1943] that will vse the diuell himselfe with curtesie: sayst thou [l. 1944] that house is darke?
Mal.
1945As hell sir Topas.
Clo.
1946Why it hath bay Windowes transparant as bari [l. 1947] cadoes, and the cleere stores toward the South north, are [l. 1948] as lustrous as Ebony: and yet complainest thou of ob [l. 1949] struction?
Mal.
1950I am not mad sir Topas, I say to you this house is [l. 1951] darke,
Clo.
1952Madman thou errest: I say there is no darknesse [l. 1953] but ignorance, in which thou art more puzel'd then the [l. 1954] Ægyptians in their fogge.
Mal.
1955I say this house is as darke as Ignorance, thogh [l. 1956] Ignorance were as darke as hell; and I say there was ne [l. 1957] uer man thus abus'd, I am no more madde then you are, [l. 1958] make the triall of it in any constant question.
Clo.
1959What is the opinion of Pythagoras concerning [l. 1960] Wilde‑fowle?
Mal.
1961That the soule of our grandam, might happily [l. 1962] inhabite a bird.
Clo.
1963What thinkst thou of his opinion?
Mal.
1964I thinke nobly of the soule, and no way aproue [l. 1965] his opinion.
Clo.
1966Fare thee well: remaine thou still in darkenesse, [l. 1967] thou shalt hold th' opinion of Pythagoras, ere I will allow [l. 1968] of thy wits, and feare to kill a Woodcocke, lest thou dis [l. 1969] possesse the soule of thy grandam. Fare thee well.
Mal.
1970Sir Topas, sir Topas.
Tob.
1971My most exquisite sir Topas.
Clo.
1972Nay I am for all waters.
Mar.
1973Thou mightst haue done this without thy berd [l. 1974] and gowne, he sees thee not.
To.
1975To him in thine owne voyce, and bring me word [l. 1976] how thou findst him: I would we were well ridde of this [l. 1977] knauery. If he may bee conueniently deliuer'd, I would [l. 1978] he were, for I am now so farre in offence with my Niece, [l. 1979] that I cannot pursue with any safety this sport the vppe [l. 1980] shot. Come by and by to my Chamber.
Clo.
1981Hey Robin, iolly Robin, tell me how thy Lady [l. 1982] does.
Mal.
1983Foole.
Clo.
1984My Lady is vnkind, perdie.
Mal.
1985Foole.
Clo.
1986Alas why is she so?
Mal.
1987Foole, I say.
Clo.
1988She loues another. Who calles, ha?
Mal.
1989Good foole, as euer thou wilt deserue well at [l. 1990] my hand, helpe me to a Candle, and pen, inke, and paper: [l. 1991] as I am a Gentleman, I will liue to bee thankefull to thee [l. 1992] for't.
Clo.
1993M. Maluolio?
Mal.
1994I good Foole.
Clo.
1995Alas sir, how fell you besides your fiue witts?
Mall.
1996Foole, there was neuer man so notoriouslie a [l. 1997] bus'd: I am as well in my wits (foole) as thou art.
Clo.
1998But as well: then you are mad indeede, if you be [l. 1999] no better in your wits then a foole.
Mal.
2000They haue heere propertied me: keepe mee in [l. 2001] darkenesse, send Ministers to me, Asses, and doe all they [l. 2002] can to face me out of my wits.
Clo.
2003Aduise you what you say: the Minister is heere.
2004Maluolio, Maluolio, thy wittes the heauens restore: en [l. 2005] deauour thy selfe to sleepe, and leaue thy vaine bibble [l. 2006] babble.
Mal.
2007Sir Topas.
Clo.
2008Maintaine no words with him good fellow. [l. 2009] Who I sir, not I sir. God buy you good sir Topas: Mar [l. 2010] ry Amen. I will sir, I will.
Mal.
2011Foole, foole, foole I say.
Clo.
2012Alas sir be patient. What say you sir, I am shent [l. 2013] for speaking to you.
Mal.
2014Good foole, helpe me to some light, and some [l. 2015] paper, I tell thee I am as well in my wittes, as any man in [l. 2016] Illyria.
Clo.
2017Well‑a‑day, that you were sir.
Mal.
2018By this hand I am: good foole, some inke, pa [l. 2019] per, and light: and conuey what I will set downe to my [l. 2020] Lady: it shall aduantage thee more, then euer the bea [l. 2021] ring of Letter did.
Clo.
2022I will help you too't. But tel me true, are you not [l. 2023] mad indeed, or do you but counterfeit.
Mal.
2024Beleeue me I am not, I tell thee true.
Clo.
2025Nay, Ile nere beleeue a madman till I see his brains [l. 2026] I will fetch you light, and paper, and inke.
Mal.
2027Foole, Ile requite it in the highest degree: [l. 2028] I prethee be gone.
Clo.
Scæna Tertia.
[Act 4, Scene 3]
![[p. 272]](FFimg:axc0292-0.jpg){kind=link}
Ol.
Seb.
Ol.
Finis Actus Quartus.
Actus Quintus. Scena Prima.
[Act 5, Scene 1]
Fab.
2072Now as thou lou'st me, let me see his Letter.
Clo.
2073Good M. Fabian, grant me another request.
Fab.
2074Any thing.
Clo.
2075Do not desire to see this Letter.
Fab.
2076This is to giue a dogge, and in recompence desire [l. 2077] my dogge againe.
Duke.
2078Belong you to the Lady Oliuia, friends?
Clo.
2079I sir, we are some of her trappings.
Duke.
2080I know thee well: how doest thou my good [l. 2081] Fellow?
Clo.
2082Truely sir, the better for my foes, and the worse [l. 2083] for my friends.
Du.
2084Iust the contrary: the better for thy friends.
Clo.
2085No sir, the worse.
Du.
2086How can that be?
Clo.
2087Marry sir, they praise me, and make an asse of me, [l. 2088] now my foes tell me plainly, I am an Asse: so that by my [l. 2089] foes sir, I profit in the knowledge of my selfe, and by my [l. 2090] friends I am abused: so that conclusions to be as kisses, if [l. 2091] your foure negatiues make your two affirmatiues, why [l. 2092] then the worse for my friends, and the better for my foes.
Du.
2093Why this is excellent.
Clo.
2094By my troth sir, no: though it please you to be [l. 2095] one of my friends.
Du.
2096Thou shalt not be the worse for me, there's gold.
Clo.
2097But that it would be double dealing sir, I would [l. 2098] you could make it another.
Du.
2099O you giue me ill counsell.
Clo.
2100Put your grace in your pocket sir, for this once, [l. 2101] and let your flesh and blood obey it.
Du.
2102Well, I will be so much a sinner to be a double [l. 2103] dealer: there's another.
Clo.
2104Primo, secundo, tertio, is a good play, and the olde [l. 2105] saying is, the third payes for all: the triplex sir, is a good [l. 2106] tripping measure, or the belles of SaintBennet sir, may put [l. 2107] you in minde, one, two, three.
Du.
2108You can foole no more money out of mee at this [l. 2109] throw: if you will let your Lady know I am here to speak [l. 2110] with her, and bring her along with you, it may awake my [l. 2111] bounty further.
Clo.
2112Marry sir, lullaby to your bountie till I come a [l. 2113] gen. I go sir, but I would not haue you to thinke, that [l. 2114] my desire of hauing is the sinne of couetousnesse: but as [l. 2115] you say sir, let your bounty take a nappe, I will awake it [l. 2116] anon.
Vio.
Du.
1. Offi.
Vio.
Du.
Ant.
![[p. 273]](FFimg:axc0293-0.jpg){kind=link}
Vio.
Du.
Ant.
Du.
on earth:
Ol.
Vio.
Du.
Ol.
Vio.
Ol.
Du.
Ol.
Du.
Ol.
Du.
Vio.
Ol.
2204Where goes Cesario?
Vio.
Ol.
Vio.
Ol.
Du.
Ol.
Du.
Ol.
Du.
Vio.
Ol.
Priest.
Du.
Vio.
2245My Lord, I do protest.
Ol.
And.
2248For the loue of God a Surgeon, send one pre [l. 2249] sently to sir Toby.
Ol.
2250What's the matter?
And.
2251H'as broke my head a‑crosse, and has giuen Sir [l. 2252] Toby a bloody Coxcombe too: for the loue of God your [l. 2253] helpe, I had rather then forty pound I were at home.
Ol.
2254Who has done this sir Andrew?
And.
2255The Counts Gentleman, one Cesario: we tooke [l. 2256] him for a Coward, but hee's the verie diuell incardinate.
Du.
2257My Gentleman Cesario?
And.
2258Odd's lifelings heere he is: you broke my head [l. 2259] for nothing, and that that I did, I was set on to do't by sir [l. 2260] Toby.
Vio.
And.
2264If a bloody coxcombe be a hurt, you haue hurt [l. 2265] me: I thinke you set nothing by a bloody Coxecombe. [l. 2266] Heere comes sir Toby halting, you shall heare more: but if [l. 2267] he had not beene in drinke, hee would haue tickel'd you [l. 2268] other gates then he did.
Du.
2269How now Gentleman? how ist with you?
To.
2270That's all one, has hurt me, and there's th'end on't: [l. 2271] Sot, didst see Dicke Surgeon, sot?
Clo.
2272O he's drunke sir Toby an houre agone: his eyes [l. 2273] were set at eight i'th morning.
To.
2274Then he's a Rogue, and a passy measures panyn: I [l. 2275] hate a drunken rogue.
Ol.
2276Away with him? Who hath made this hauocke [l. 2277] with them?
And.
2278Ile helpe you sir Toby, because we'll be drest to [l. 2279] gether.
To.
2280Will you helpe an Asse‑head, and a coxcombe, & [l. 2281] a knaue: a thin fac'd knaue, a gull?
![[p. 274]](FFimg:axc0294-0.jpg){kind=link}
Ol.
2282Get him to bed, and let his hurt be look'd too.
Seb.
Du.
Seb.
Ant.
Seb.
Ant.
Ol.
Seb.
Vio.
Seb.
Vio.
Seb.
Vio.
Seb.
Vio.
Seb.
Du.
Vio.
Du.
Vio.
Ol.
Cl.
2361Truely Madam, he holds Belzebub at the staues end as [l. 2362] well as a man in his case may do: has heere writ a letter to [l. 2363] you, I should haue giuen't you to day morning. But as a [l. 2364] madmans Epistles are no Gospels, so it skilles not much [l. 2365] when they are deliuer'd.
Ol.
2366Open't, and read it.
Clo.
2367Looke then to be well edified, when the Foole [l. 2368] deliuers the Madman. By the Lord Madam.
Ol.
2369How now, art thou mad?
Clo.
2370No Madam, I do but reade madnesse: and your [l. 2371] Ladyship will haue it as it ought to bee, you must allow [l. 2372] Vox.
Ol.
2373Prethee reade i'thy right wits.
Clo.
2374So I do Madona: but to reade his right wits, is to [l. 2375] reade thus: therefore, perpend my Princesse, and giue [l. 2376] eare.
Ol.
2377Read it you, sirrah.
Fab.
2378By the Lord Madam, you wrong me, and [l. 2379] the world shall know it: Though you haue put mee into [l. 2380] darkenesse, and giuen your drunken Cosine rule ouer me, [l. 2381] yet haue I the benefit of my senses as well as your Ladie [l. 2382] ship. I haue your owne letter, that induced mee to the [l. 2383] semblance I put on; with the which I doubt not, but to [l. 2384] do my selfe much right, or you much shame: thinke of [l. 2385] me as you please. I leaue my duty a little vnthought of, [l. 2386] and speake out of my iniury. The madly vs'd Maluolio.
Ol.
2387Did he write this?
Clo.
2388I Madame.
Du.
2389This sauours not much of distraction.
Ol.
Du.
Ol.
Du.
Ol.
Mal.
Ol.
Mal.
![[p. 275]](FFimg:axc0295-0.jpg){kind=link}
Ol.
Fab.
Ol.
Clo.
2449Why some are borne great, some atchieue great
[l. 2450] nesse, and some haue greatnesse throwne vpon them. I
[l. 2451] was one sir, in this Enterlude, one sir Topas sir, but that's
[l. 2452] all one: By the Lotd Lord Foole, I am not mad: but do you re
[l. 2453] member, Madam, why laugh you at such a barren rascall,
[l. 2454] and you smile not he's gag'd: and thus the whirlegigge
[l. 2455] of time, brings in his reuenges.
Mal.
Ol.
Du.
FINIS.